When Do You Use Tough Love?
Many people who are thinking about an intervention are afraid that the intervention is all about tough love. Although few, alcohol and drug interventions actually go to “tough love” or “bottom-lines,” many families place a great deal of attention on it when deciding on whether or not to do an addiction intervention. Some family members are simply afraid that when we arrive we will tell a family that they have to throw their loved one out of their life, or the intervention will make the situation worse than it is. Families can end up being stuck between fear and hope. Fear that they will make things worse if they push the issue and the hope that one day their loved one may “wake up” and want to change. In the worst cases a family will just hang on, unwilling to make a collective move, until that terrible day when they get the dreaded phone call that it is too late.
Alcohol or drug intervention is never about us forcing you to disconnect or detach from a loved one addicted to drugs or alcohol. You will only do what you feel you must. We are only there to guide and empower you through the steps that will allow you to see things differently.
“Tough Love” and “Bottom Lines” are a last resort. And then and only then when they are said they must be followed through with. Otherwise, the addicted person gains back the control. This is where a lot of interventions go off track and why a professional interventionist is used to guide the family as to when the proper time, if ever they are used.
About the Author: Jeff Pope
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